WIR: Feb 15 - 28

The 2 weeks leading up to Feb 24 was really an eye-opener.

All I can remember was to try to complete all the EGAs. Admittedly, I hated the EGA concept from a review point of view, however, these EGAs showed me the direction to take. So it was a process to try to compete the EGAs.

I am honestly very happy that on Feb 24, once my Client filed, the database is ready to be archived, with all the EGAs final reviewed. I never have this feeling back in Singapore.

And on Thursday I went to Santa Cruz. Gotten into a small accident and lucky nothing major.

The rest of the week is about sleeping in and relaxing.

WIR: Feb 8-14

Been constantly in a state of depression for the week.

Saw a online story, which became a web series, and I am totally into. 

All I need now is to be someone's universe. And to nestle into the bed with. Finally, in this week of Valentine 2016, my internal bio-clock is ringing so loud that the vibration caused the metal bits of the alarm to come off. The funny thing is that what I want is something so simple, yet so difficult.

The problem is that I think too much.

Yes.

My imagination knows no bound. I am so up-tight about taking that first step, that I rather the other party takes it for me. But when they do, it just will not work out. And since when I was in JC to Uni, girls will express their interests in me. Rarely the other way around. Kept deluding myself that I have all the time in the world to find the right one. The one who is my everything and I am everything to. A lifelong promise and love. A completion. A partner in life. Literally my other half.

And when I thought I found the right one, but I am glad things did not turn out for the better. For a moment, I was worried it was going too well.  

And comes the second problem is that I know which type of person I want to be. Like a seasoned auditor, I have prepared a checklist and the threshold is pretty stringent. After all, this is for a lifetime. Unfortunately for myself (nothing to do with the ladies), most of them don't meet the criteria. 

And then this week, I realized that my life is no drama; its so standardized and sanitized. I am no longer young to yearn for the trials and tribulations that come along with it. How many years can I have left? Whilst my friends and acquaintances have basically settled down and starting a family, I am still wantoning my life away. 

I believe that for two person to come together and to live together and to grow old together, it takes a lot of guts. I have none. I am afraid of failing. I am afraid that I will make the wrong choice.

And.

Even I found one, is this it? What's next?

Family, children, bills......

Seems like the unknown brings about more expectations and hope, when suddenly, one day, I realized that I have nothing to start with at the start.

也许等到对的人，这一切会变好。

有你的世界，我看不见烦恼。

我对你承诺了我的所有，

让你以后永无纷扰。

WIR: Feb 1 - 7

This week was about work work work. Although the work load is lighter, I can't put a finger to where this whole thing is not motivating me at all. Firstly, the work load is light. Yes. I need to manage a few more engagements to make this all worthwhile. Secondly, the different methodology and the EGAs. I must vent. The way about how this EGA thing work is really not efficient from a reviewers' point of view. There are so many of these EGAs and most of it becomes a mindless exercise of cross-referencing, such that, its becoming pointless. And the danger is that this EGA will reference to the another EGA and that EGA will reference back to this EGA. Furthermore, it doesn't provide a convenient way to extract information and to review the risks from a high level perspective. And I am slowly getting used to the methodology. Accept-reject, non-stat, etc.

Ok enough of work.

On Saturday, I went to cut my hair. Heart-pained. $35 dollars =_=. I thought it was a cheap saloon. None-the-less, the service was above average, but I don't need such good service for my hair. Its basically blade 1 all round and cut short a bit on the top.

After that, drove my car aimlessly around, exploring new places. I like San Jose as the air is generally fresh, surrounded mountains and almost flat terrain. And not forgetting the blue sky.

Then sent my car for washing. I love it when my car is clean.

Was invited to Cindy's and Gavin's place near Cupertino on the same Saturday. Met a few new friends, and became friendlier to those who I have met before, i.e. Siling, Joshua, Wanxin. It was interesting to have almost all but one, wearing red. Had steamboat and YUSHENG. Cannot believe I get to lao yusheng in a foreign land.

Played mahjong and I won the first round with a 发财. Subsequently kept losing until the West and North wind. In the end won $2.50.